PART EIGHT - A Father's Role

Common sense tells us that the father has a direct and definite role in the mental condition of the mother during this critical first trimester or first three months of pregnancy. He can either help create a situation of stress and fear in the life of the mother of his unborn child, or he could help make her feel comfortable, secure and loved as the mother of his child should be.

His ability to help her remain calm, secure and feel loved and cherished during the first trimester is his part in an effort to help pamper the mother and help create a healthy child.

Below are a few things the father can do to help the mother during this critical period:

1. Learn all he can about the Intersex condition so he understands the importance of his role during this critical period.

2. Communicate with his girlfriend or spouse about the pregnancy, how it’s coming along, ASK what he can do to help her feel pampered and loved.

3. Take on more responsibility around the home and create less work for her.

4. Help any current children or family members get involved in helping the expectant mother.

5. Show your support by going to the scheduled doctor’s appointments with the expectant mother.

6. Pamper her with small gifts and surprises just for her to show she is loved.

7. If you don’t already do so, hug her every day or multiple times a day when you see her. Your loving energy is what helps keep her calm and balanced.

8. Provide an atmosphere of security and protection and remove as much stress from her life as possible.

9. Increase your level of intimacy. The more simple intimacy between the mother and father, the more balanced the mother will be, and sexually healthier the child will be.

10. Schedule more quiet time with you and the expectant mother to relax and to maintain open communication.

11. Understand that this time period is all about the mother and the development of your male child. Make this her special time.

12. Make her your #1 Priority. Make sure she knows by your actions and words, that she and your unborn child are your #1 priority.

13. Avoid Conflict situations. If you have been in a relationship/marriage for any time at all, you already know the ‘buttons’ to push that throw her off balance. As she knows yours. The focus is to end the competition or battle for who’s right or wrong, and find a common ground which will be the foundation your unborn child will be built on.

As the father, you must understand that the healthy sexual development of the male or female child depends on the balanced loving relationship between you and the mother of your child. More than ever, this is where the union and team effort will be important in creating a healthy and sexually balanced child.

The positive result from this three month process is that many couples may develop even more respectful, close and loving relationships because they have more than just themselves as a reason to truly show their love for each other.